New Reminders: Hate
by Ardith Hoff
My first real encounter with the word “hate”, and its meaning, happened when I was just a small child of about six-or-seven-years of age. I was playing with my two younger cousins, on their farm, and the boy cousin started to climb over a gate into a cow pasture. Just then, his teen-aged brother came around the corner of the barn and told him to get down off the gate, saying that he was not allowed to go into the pasture when the bull was in there. My cousin started to defy his brother and continued to climb the gate. His brother quickly came and grabbed him before he could get to the other side. My young cousin turned on his brother and started hitting him and saying, “I hate you! I hate you! You never let me do anything!” To our surprise, the older brother simply held his little brother and explained, not why he couldn’t go into the bull pen, but why he shouldn’t use the word “hate”.
He sat down with us and calmly explained that when you say you hate someone, you are actually saying that you wish that person was dead, that they didn’t exist anymore. We were shocked! I had heard young friends on the playground and even grownups say they hated someone or something and had no real concept of what it actually meant. I was sure none of them really meant that they wanted the person they said it to or about to die, be killed or to no longer exist. People I knew would never have meant to inflict real harm on anyone and certainly would not have wished them dead or to disappear. The word hate is all too often used casually. What’s worse, is that it is becoming more common to actually mean exactly what my older cousin said it means. Though he might not have known the exact reference, his definition is based on the bible verse found in 1 John 3:15 “Anyone who hates a brother or sister is a murderer and does not have eternal life abiding in them.”
The Bible generally condemns hating people, urging love and forgiveness for enemies. It encourages us to pray for those who hate us. It also encourages "hating" evil and sin, which is seen as a righteous stance against wrongdoing. The concept of hate directed at fellow humans is presented as darkness and a betrayal of God's law, while hating what God hates—violence, and lies—is presented as a sign of being right with Him. The following verses help explain the nature of and reasons for love. John 3:16 says: "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life". 1 John 4:19 says: "We love because he first loved us.” Romans 5:8 says: "But God demonstrates his own love for us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us". Romans 8:38-39 says: "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord".
Hate is a strong word, but love is stronger! Love, whether loving others or being loved, makes us feel connected, safe, secure complete, nurtured, serene, alive, creative, empowered and whole. May we all use the power of love to help stamp out hate.